Misty Lynch - How to Become Financially Independent

SPEAKER_00 0:03

This is the Beyond the Story Podcast, a show that goes way beyond the story. And Sebastian Fro. Misty Lynch, what's up, Rockstar?

SPEAKER_01 0:23

Hi, nice to meet you. I'm happy to be here.

SPEAKER_00 0:25

It's good to meet you too. Good old LinkedIn coming through again.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

I know. It's nice to see some interaction over there. Actually, it's been a pretty, it's been a pretty supportive place to be lately. So I can't complain about any of the social media channels I've been on lately. It's been all good things.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Yeah, I think LinkedIn is probably one of the most popular platforms out there. And it LinkedIn was the first social media platform. Not a lot of people know that. That was right, you know, pre-Myspace days they came around. And then the entire platform, I'd say, over the past three years has radically changed into a true social media platform. I always like to call it a perpetual networking event. Definitely better than Facebook. Facebook's become more of the backyard barbecue.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

So yeah, no, I do, I do appreciate them both for different reasons. But I do like for business, I've definitely met some really great people, just kind of who, you know, running their business or setting things up and kind of looking at what other people are doing out there. So sure.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Never been never been easier to connect these days.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

You know, I think you're right. And I'm usually a person that loves connecting in person. I think that, you know, being, you know, socially distanced from people was a challenge for me. So you find other ways. And man, have I been able to connect with people, get comfortable jumping on video, where like I think, you know, two years ago you'd be like, ew, what are you doing? Turning your camera on. And now you can really see somebody who's maybe not in your area. So that's that's a pretty nice thing to have.

SPEAKER_00 1:44

That's been one of the best things that come out of this whole Rona deal is that people have been, well, technology doesn't give a shit about our feelings or how we feel about it. It's going to continue to evolve and move. But sometimes, like it happened with cell phones and the people that said, I'll never have a cell phone. I got a I got a phone on my wall at home, eventually have just, you know, turned the turned the corner due to technology. And that's what happened here with with the pandemic coming out of nowhere. Everyone was forced to adapt to technology. Adapt or just not be part of it, which I don't even know how things can get done if you're not adapting to it.

SPEAKER_01 2:18

So yeah, no, I think everyone has, especially, I mean, even from people I grandparents, everybody has been like, you want to see each other? Get on board. And hey, you know what? It works. It's kind of nice.

SPEAKER_00 2:28

Yeah, we'll do whatever it takes to be able to connect and we move with the tide, even then, even though even when we don't know that we have to do it. So you and I were chatting for a few minutes before the interview here. You got quite the interesting story. It started at a very, very young age of 10 years old, becoming obsessed with the world of money just based on what you experienced, just a short time of those of those 10 years here, uh, and became obsessed with it that later became what you thought was going to be your career, that ended up actually being your for real career. So let's back up to when you started to have that realization and what brought you there and then how the story unfolded.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Yeah. So I I mean, I grew up in Connecticut and my my father's self-employed and my mom stayed home with us. And so for the first few years of my life, man, I'd say from like birth to about, you know, nine, 10 years old, things are really comfortable. We had a big house, we had nice cars, we had dogs, you know, all the toys, all the stuff that we wanted as a child in the 80s, rolling in cabbage patch kids, all of the things that you'd possibly want. And so that just felt like a comfortable life for me. And so I know we develop so much of our personality in those first few years of like who we actually feel like we are. And so all of a sudden in the early 90s, my father's business, he's an engineer, he it hit some roadblocks. And he's just a sole sole proprietor by himself. And so we at that point, we had to, we moved, we sold just about everything we had. We had to get rid of our dogs because we were moving into like an apartment. It was just such an odd and uncomfortable time. And I remember just feeling that stress of money. Like actually, money was never even on my radar until I was about that age. And I could see, you know, as a kid, you see when there's stress and there's tension in your house. And for the longest time, I just had this belief that if I had more money, if we had more money, all of these problems would go away. Money is the cause of all of these problems and the solution. And so basically, I just, you know, as soon as I could start working, I started working, I weighted tables. I basically just was like, I am always going to have money. I'm going to figure this thing out, and everything is going to be perfect. And like, so I did all of the things that we were told. I'm like a, I think a geriatric millennial, you know. So I think we were told, you know, you go to college, you buy a home, you have a dog, you know, have some baby, all of these things will work out. And so, you know, I tried to, you know, I graduated and found a job in finance and tried to make it as a financial advisor in my early 20s. And I had like, I had no clients. I had no family to go to to say, like, why don't you just throw me a couple hundred thousand dollars? I'll invest it for you. Smart. I passed all these tests with flying colors. And basically, it was really my mindset that was so messed up with all of these things about money that, you know, I ended up taking a corporate job for 12 years, just doing something I didn't really want to do to make money, which I thought would just be the right thing to do. And so in 2020, I had, you know, kind of ran into a friend of mine who started his own business. And he was like, what are you doing? You're all over social media. I see you doing these things. And I'm like, you know, I work with this company. There's this, there's this part of me that just wants to be out there talking about money, talking about how women can be more successful, how we can learn about finances, how we don't have to outsource it to somebody else or just rely on somebody else to come and solve the problems. And so I did some writing and some blogging, and he wanted me to come join his firm. And so in the beginning of 2020, left the six-figure corporate job to go be, you know, an independent advisor. And then the world shut down. So it really gave me a little bit of time to start thinking about how do I want to reach people? What do I want to do? And I ended up getting a life coaching certification during the pandemic while I was, you know, homeschooling kids, starting, you know, starting up with a new company, getting this certification and just kind of keeping things together. And then I started a podcast too, just because I wanted to, you know, reach as many people as possible and find a way to communicate and let that extrovert part out. So just kind of felt like it was a real transformational year. And now I try to help people with all of the things, not just the investments, not just choosing the companies that we're going to put their money into and doing the financial plans. We really attack your mindset and try to make sure that you're somebody who isn't just hoping to get wealthy or wants to pay all the bills and then eventually die. Like we want people to really start dreaming bigger. And then the money part will just come and we'll just figure out how to fund all of those things.

SPEAKER_00 7:18

Okay, let's talk about that for a second. I literally just had this conversation with a client right before I hung up, and I'm not a financial coach or life coach. I know a little bit about life, and I and I do coach, so maybe a little bit about that. But I I've I too had a similar conversation with myself early on. It was a very scarcity mindset childhood. My father always had coupons. My mother would say, if it takes 50 bucks to get to Orlando and we got 48, we're going. So, and that that that was just so I had the two extreme circumstances where we've got someone who's extremely frugal and we got another person go, listen, there's no there's no bank accounts being pulled behind a hearse, is the mentality. She still lives that she's 74 now and still is you know YOLO, but been able to change her conversation with it and evolve. And I've seen that happen too. That my dad still stayed in this scarcity mindset where he would gloat that he's retired and debt-free, yet it's still that scarcity. So I found myself wrestled in between the two and figuring out that whole process. I I thankfully made the decision that I was gonna break the generational curse with my daughter, and we were gonna start doing that when she was 16 years old. We were just gonna, I and I didn't have any advice to give her other than life sucks without money. It just does because it's a function of what we need. However, it is a byproduct of doing what we love, but it's also a that mindset and changing. So we we started to change our conversation. We we we weren't allowed to say things like, How are we gonna pay for that? We'll never be able to afford that. I can't go because I don't just simple little tweaks that happened and that started that ripple effect started to to go through to other family members. So by default, I don't know if it's made the impact, but there's been more times than not. My my as an entrepreneur, there's been some months my my daughter's had more money than I've had in the past. So I think that's a good indicator doing it. But I've really helped her and mentored her up too with you know powerful women that really help in the whole aspect of specifically money and and mindset on there. But is is what you teach having a positive mindset about money, knowing number one, I attract everything that's coming to me. Number two, I'm ridiculously passionate about the work that I do, and a byproduct of doing that and serving other people is being able to make money and reap the benefits from it. Is that part of where it's at? Because I think this is an on because I haven't figured it out. I will have figured it out when I have too much money to ever spend in my life and I'm able to start doing amazing things in the world with it. I think it's a constant evolving thing. But if you can shed some light on this whole money mindset, because I know it's so huge. I'll never forget a friend giving, in fact, to my daughter's mentor giving a keynote talk when she launched her brand six years ago. And she came out and she said, money. Money. Money. Money. And she gave those four different responses on how we show up and how we react to. And I never ever forgot that whole process. So I'm excited to hear what you have to say. I know that was a little long-winded. I promise it's about you.

SPEAKER_01 10:24

The thing that you write, I I think this is the part that we all are like, oh, I'm not an expert, but like you're curious. Like, if you're just curious, instead of like we're never gonna be able to afford this, instead, if you're just like, okay, how could we afford this? And you say that in front of your kids. And then I mean, the kids are super creative. We turn that off. We try to just be like, nope, remember, like the little part of our brain is saying, like, stay safe, stay in the box. You can't afford this. Remember what a loser you are. Like, don't forget it. And so we don't give ourselves this opportunity to actually be creative and try to think. It's like I talk to people who just think that they're a $50,000 a year person, like there's some fact, or like they're telling me the weather, like I'm never gonna make more than that. Why? And like half the time, it's just kind of questioning where these beliefs come from. And a lot of time it is coming from things that were just kind of drilled into our heads with we didn't even notice it. And so I think it's important to kind of recognize the way she said money when you were talking about the keynote speaker. Like for a long time, when I was, you know, a teenager, I was incredibly jealous of people that had money. And we were the probably like the least, you know, wealthy family in a pretty wealthy town. We moved into a good school district. My parents were really smart about that piece of it, is like getting us into a good, you know, a good place, even if we were renting an arm or something like that. And so, like, I would be so jealous that if you said, like my husband, I remember him telling me, like, oh yeah, when I was a kid, I went to this place, Pine Acres, in the summer where we swam and played tennis. And I was like, Oh, oh, pine acres where we swim and play tennis. Like, that's how I felt about people who had money. Yeah, that mindset was gonna keep me broke forever. Instead of being like, wow, that would be really cool as a kid. Like, that must have been fun. What did your parents do? How did like how did you swing that? You know, and it was just like, oh, his father was an attorney for the artists, worked really hard, had a nice life for four kids. That's not something to roll your eyes at. Right. It's cool. It was just my defense mechanism, my way of keeping myself in like the right position. Like, well, I struggled, so I'm better. No, you're not. You know, I think it's important to say, like, you know, money, it doesn't solve everybody. It's not gonna make someone love you. It's not gonna like buy your health back, but it can solve a lot of problems. Right. It can solve a lot of problems. And keep so I think having like this open mind about it and actually questioning some of the bullshit that is just it's not a fact. It's just what we are, you know, we're just we're feeding ourselves to make us feel better. Where it's like, I could talk to clients and ask what they would do with a million dollars, and they're like, clew, like I don't know. Like they can't even think about having no student debt anymore or something like that. So if you can get yourself at least a little bit further past what's real right now, there's not really much limitation on what you can at least dream up or think, you know, could be possible in the future. We just like to shut it down really fast because it, because it's hard.

SPEAKER_00 13:24

Right. Well, well, what isn't, right? We're conditioned to be able to take that process. Yeah, the whole imposter syndrome, not good enough, those limiting beliefs of that inner critic coming to, you know, coming to life and speaking volumes in our life, do really create some barriers and keep us exactly. And I I I remember having that conversation with my sister. She's like, the the more the scarcity conversation continues, the longer that you stay there. And I don't, it's a so it's a really a decision-making process. How does how does the law of attraction, if it's even a thing, come to play in all this whole mindset thing?

SPEAKER_01 13:59

Yeah, so I think that money is, you know, we kind of think about money as being like a pie. Like you get a you get a bigger slice, I get a smaller slice. And it's actually like constantly changing hands and moving through people. So, like if you feel like if you are a good person and you can create value in the world and get paid for it, somebody is, you know, somebody paying you for something is getting value. I have no problem paying for things that help me get where I want to go faster or help me, you know, deal with something that's going on in my life. We we accept that from our employers. Like, I do this for you and you pay me. But I think we have a hard time imagining that we can generate this in our own, in our own minds just by taking a risk or actually believing in ourselves more. So we believe that our value is worth whatever someone will pay us. And it's actually like, no, you create value. And then all of these more, all more things will kind of come your way, these opportunities, ways to make money. You'll see serial entrepreneurs, you'll see people that just can't seem to stop inventing new businesses and doing new things. It's probably like, because if you said, like, okay, if I took away every dollar you had right now, could you recreate it? Like the Mark Cubans of the world are like, yeah, just give me, give me a little time, you know, like no, no doubt at all. Where when we have things like imposter syndrome, or we haven't seen anybody do something yet, so there's no proof. Like when I first became a financial advisor and all of the successful financial advisors looked, you know, like six-year-old white men, and they didn't look a thing like me, then my brain was like, see, this can't happen. You know, this doesn't suit you. Instead of thinking, like, wow, there's so much space for me. I am like, you know, it's just unique, or there might be some people out there who are looking for somebody exactly like me to help them. Instead, immediately you're just like, nope, that's that's just not gonna happen for you. Look at this. You're not you're not the right person. And it's not just women that have imposter syndrome, it's it's everybody. All of us look at somebody else and are just like, ooh, they figured it out. When they actually probably went through a lot to get there, you just don't see it in the highlight reel. A lot of people are afraid to share it because it's ugly. Like, did I think that anybody would want to talk to me or give me millions of dollars to invest if I told them that I went to school on Pell Grants, that I, you know, we pretty much experienced poverty for you know, at least a solid decade of my life. Like, and then I think now, like, why wouldn't they? The perfect person to give that to because I know how to create wealth and I know how important it is, and I will take care of it. It wasn't just handed to me. But for the longest time, I was like, this is just so much evidence. This is not gonna work out.

SPEAKER_00 16:35

Evidence is always available.

SPEAKER_01 16:37

Always brings them like a supercomputer. I mean, if you are looking to prove yourself right, just go to your social media phase. I mean, it's serving up like, okay, well, I'm liberal, I'm this, okay. Well, this is why you're exactly right. And everybody else is getting their own little reassurance that they're perfect while they watch advertising things like that. So, you know, it's just something our brain loves to see. That's why we can't turn it off. So it's important. I make my clients do worksheets and get creative and imagine they had a million dollars. Imagine themselves if they how would they feel if they were a fully booked coach or a six-figure business owner? Would they make the same decisions they're making right now? A lot of times, no. They're like, oh no, if I was fully booked, I wouldn't cut my rates for somebody who was giving me a hard time, or I wouldn't just drop everything and take an appointment if they didn't have it scheduled. Okay, and why are you doing it now? Like trying to get them to think in that different space. And it's fun, it's fun to use your brain for for good.

SPEAKER_00 17:37

Yeah, it's fun to think. Yeah, highly underrated these days.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

Yeah, I mean, there's so many ways to like zone out and buffer and not think that I think part of the reason we avoid doing it is just like it's difficult to face some of this stuff. But once you do, about you know, when you talk about the abundance and things like that, I mean, you can really, I mean, you can really dream bigger.

SPEAKER_00 18:02

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I learned so much from this this conversation. I I so appreciate you uh taking time out of your day to hang out. I love, I love, love, love, love, love what you're doing. You're taking two of one of the most incredible things I think a human being can do, which is take complete control of your life and take complete control of your finances. And I believe that you figure out those two winning combinations, you can really do the world and those around you a great deal of service. So just wanted to commend you on the work you're doing and the success you've had since you've arrived at figuring out where you should be now. Like you feel you f it is very clear you're in your groove and you are you're going nowhere but up. So I'm stoked to be to be connected with you here. If you're listening to this interview and you're thinking, holy cow, my life kind of sucks, and so does my finances. You need to reach out and have a conversation with Misty. All of her contact links are going to be in the show notes. That's the description of this episode that you're listening to right now. So, Misty, keep rocking and rolling. I'm a fan already, and we just met.

SPEAKER_01 18:59

Thank you. Thank you so much. I really appreciate being able to talk to your audience and meet you.

SPEAKER_00 19:03

Absolutely. You have to come back again sometime.

SPEAKER_01 19:05

I'd love to.

SPEAKER_00 19:06

I'll talk to you later. Until next time, friends. Thanks so much for tuning into this episode of the Beyond the Story Podcast. Be sure to appreciate it. If you haven't done so already, make sure you're subscribed to the show. This way you'll get updates as new episodes become available. If you feel so inclined, please give us a review. Be sure to appreciate it. Signing off from the podcast, launchlab.com studios. We'll talk to you next time.